They Call Him Fiddy

Bear, his brother Brandon, a Cambodian named Sela and I went to the 50 Cent concert last Sunday here in Bangkok. I will be the first one to point out that we were all heavily intoxicated, which can only equal one thing: getting shot. Well, ok. It wasn't that bad. In fact no one got shot. But we did have a blast. Singha beer sponsored the event, and although the beer line was slower than Bear getting ready to go to lunch, the beers were huge and delicious.

The concert itself was better than expected. I once saw a live appearance of 50 on MTV Spring Break and it was obviously live because the performance was terrible. I mean, you couldn't understand half the shit 50 was saying. It was good to see that he is better at live performances. Fort Minor (Lincoln Park singer's solo project) was rockin'. Tony Yayo, Llyod Banks, and 50 played all of their hits, including half of "Hate it or Love it" and talking mad shit about The Game and leaving out his section.

Even being drunk as we all were, I have never felt safer at a rap concert in my life. It wasn't anything like the time I saw Snoop Dogg with my Dad in California (yeah, the pops is a HUGE Snoop fan) and we sat next to a group of four black women from Oakland who sucked down roaches like a Popeyes fried chicken promotion. I think there were a total of five black dudes at the 50 concert while weed is strictly illegal in Thailand.

Another factor that gave us HUGE amounts of cred was the fact that we had a Cambodian with us who has been shot three times .... by rockets (and doesn't walk with a limp). So if anyone tried to start some shit, hey we rep a homie who's been shot by rockets. RESPECT !

~ J-dub

P.S. Over Christmas the pops told me that he heard a radio story saying that Fiddy's persona is only a character that was made up, he was never shot, grew up in a well-to-do neighborhood, etc. If anyone can verify this, I would be interested.

The Cali Thais [ Heart ] Karl Pilkington

Despite my neverending aversion of Apple*, I recently got an iPod for my Birthday, and have since been sucked into the world of iTunes. I have to admit that some of the Podcasts are pretty sweet, and one of the best is the Ricky Gervais Show, which features three dudes - Ricky Gervais from the BBC Comedy "The Office", Steve Merchant, and an umemployed radio producer, named Karl Pilkington. If you haven't heard of this show, I implore you to check it out. Pilkington is hilarious. So hilarious, in fact, that I could eat a knob at night.

~ J-Dub

*Apple is gay. It's science.

Two Things That Scare The Hell Out of Me

I'm sure we've all heard the news as of late... and there are things to fear. Sure, there is always some sensational news about something that is going to end the world or our freedom as we know it. Let's face it - when it comes to news, sex isn't the only thing that sells. Fear is a pretty good way to go also.

This little guy may look cute and cuddly, but H5N1 scares the hell out of me. Now I'm not sure how the media is portraying things back in the States, but in the area of the world that is in a position to suffer tremendously, things are pretty laxidasical about the whole thing. I read today that Indonesia is finding that it is spreading faster in its population as well as killing its victims faster. Of course, you don't hear much about it over here, but I guess it is mostly the lowly rural people who are dying - so why should the governments here care? Sometimes I fear they don't see the bigger picture. Even if the virus never mutates into a human-to-human threat, the economic impact caused by the kulling of chickens around the world (along with many other friends of a feather) has the potential to be enormous.

The second titan of fear for me is religious extremism. Any religion. Anytime someone uses faith to justify murder, there can be no winners. Somehow I don't think God, in whatever form you want to call Him/Her/Them, really needs the confidence boost of a soul exterminated in His/Her/Their name.

Specifically, I'm speaking of the extremist protests as of late over publication of religiously inappropriate material in some newspapers in Europe - though any violent backlash from an extremist section of any religion can fall into this "scary as hell" section. Fanaticism and Fundamentalism are dangerous.

Though I've not seen the cartoons, I understand that they are considered to be blasphemous. Fair enough - stage protests (idealy with permit in hand) and boycott goods if you must - just don't kill people. Go through the appropriate channels to have your voice heard over your frustration and indignation. Turning to violence isn't exactly going to win a lot of global support for your cause. Now I must make the clear distinction that the violence is not condoned by the average moderate and conservative Muslim. These are cases of extremist views - nonetheless, they are do not lend to better communication between Muslim and Non-Muslim nations and peoples.

I just read in the paper that and Indian government minister has offered an $11.5 Million US Dollar reward for anyone who beheads one of the cartoonist. And in Pakistan, a Cleric has offered $1 Million and a car for anyone who kills one of the responsible cartoonists. Can you just imagine if someone like Condaliza Rice publically put out a hit on someone... anyone because of slanderous media? It would be World War III. And that's why Religious Fanaticism scares the hell out of me - because everyone feels like they have "God" on their side. And here I was thinking that religion was about love...
~Bear

Bangkok 100 Rock Festival 2006

In a, "can I get a hell yeah !?!" sort of way, J-Dub and Bear will be attending the Bangkok 100 Rock Festival 2006 this weekend. Two days of good ol' Rock & Roll. Lineup includes: Oasis, Franz Ferdinand, Snow Patrol, Maximo Park, Ian Brown, Sterophonics, Placebo, and dEUS. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.

You Dick .... You Shot Me !!

Coolest "Not a blimp"... Ever

Now this is flying in style.

Dubai and China : Leading your Skyscrapper Construction Projects

Dubai and China are leading the world stage for building YOUR new Skyscrappers.

The Golfing Report

The long awaited J-Dub Goes Golfing Report is here. Now golfing in Thailand is great for a number of reasons, but with it comes with a few givens that aren't so pleasant. So I'll start with the bad and explain how the cleverness of the Asians have turned each disagreeable aspect into a pleasant experience.

The Bad #1: It will be a shock to no one that Thailand is hot year round. Sweaty balls hot. The kind of hot that turns pale Irish-blooded white boys like me into burned red tomatos in under an hour. It will also surprise no one that golfing requires an extended amount of time being in the sun and last Sunday was no exception. Hot, hot, hottness marked the first part of the day.

The Good #1: One word: umbrellas. That's right, each player is given an umbrella during the length of play. In just the same way I don't want to get buned like parking lot attendant at the State Fair, neither do the Asians. But I know what your thinking, "How can you hold an umbrella while you hold your clubs?" The answer is simple: you don't have to carry your clubs, because there is a caddy that carries your clubs for you. See The Good #2.

The Good #2: Your own personal caddy makes golfing an entirely new and exciting experience. (If you've experienced golf with a caddy, you can skip over this part) I can't over-emphasize how cool a caddy is. They are helpful in so many ways, probably the number one reason has to do with the fact that all the caddies in Asia are females under 30. They too do not want to become blackened by the sun, so they cover every extremity in clothing. Nevertheless, they all wear tight clothing and all are very cute. I was fortunate to have a hottie. Aesthetics aside, caddies also:

- Carry your clubs for you
- Keep score for you (which is key when you've been consuming booze)
- Give you tips on what clubs to use when
- Give tips on how to read the green
- Oh, yeah, most important - they carry your clubs for you

The Bad #2: The Asians take golfing very seriously. I swear it's like watching any Sean Penn movie - if you get sucked into it, you won't smile for the next three days. Myself, I like to play to have fun on the course. Some might call me a weekend golfer, and I'm fine with that tag. I'm out to relax, have fun, and crack open some beers. But especially the Japanese and Koreans, each swing is like they're preforming open heart surgery.

The Good #3: There is beer everywhere along the way. The choices are very limited: Singha and Hieniken, but there is nothing better to cut throught the solemnity. I was fortunate to be paired with two other Thai dudes who were happy to let the brews fly and make jokes along the way.

The Bad #3: The language barrier. While I strongly feel fortunate for having been raised in an English speaking country, it doesn't help very much in Thailand, where everyone here (unlike Cambodia) can get by in their day to day business speaking Thai. But my limited ability to speak Thai (it's a damn hard language to learn) makes conversations difficult.

The Good #4: See The Good #3.

The Good #5: Most of the golfing terminology stays in English. This I found interesting. Words like "iron", "the green", "bunker", "the tee", and yelling "FOUR !!!" when your ball is about to hit someone in the nuts, all remain in English.

I'm sure there is more, but I leave J-Dub's Golfing Report at that. Ya'll just have to wait for part Deux.

~ J-Dub

J-Dub goes golfing !

I love golfing, and golfing in Thailand is awesome. The full report is on the way.

~ J-dub

Bear's Birthday Presents

Picture #1: Stuffed bear key chains packaged in a pink carrying case. Gift given by a Thai.

Picture #2: CD mixed tape. Gift given by an American

Wow.... Wow!

New Massage Shop Right Next Door

The Cali Thais are happy to report that there is a posh, new massage shop that opened up right next door to our office. Very nice inside, complete with orchids on the pillow and a rock garden in the front entrance. While this will only benefit the Cali Thais, we thought you should know the pricing breakdown:

- Head and Shoulder Massage for 30min - 99 Baht ($2.50)
- Traditional Thai Massage for 1 hour - 180 Baht ($4.50)
- Traditional Thai Massage for 2 hours - 300 Baht ($6.50)
- Arroma Therepy for 1 hour - 300 Baht ($6.50)
- Oil Massage for 1 hour - 300 Baht ($6.50)
- Happy Ending - Didn't ask, but probably not offered (Damn)

~ J-Dub

Gimme your best shot.

While out in the villages (see below post) I encoutered a rather heated discussion between a chief and the people in his village. My dozen words of Khmer couldn't distinguish whether they were angry or just talking loudly in their sing-song language. But I think they were yelling about the best place to place the well. So I kept my mouth shut.

The scary part of the whole experience was the fact that the dudes were fully tatted up with Khmer temples and ancient writtings all over their bodies. Apparently, these tattoos are meant to be magical and deflect any bullets that might be heading toward their body. (I've heard stories from multiple Cambodians who swear they were shot at during the war but the bullets never entered their bodies thanks to the tattoos. Pulp Fiction like.)

So I got to thinking, these dudes have most likely killed a few people.

So then I got to thinking, boy it would suck to get shot. Then I asked Brandon, "if you knew you were going to be shot, where would the best place be?" He said maybe the ass. I think maybe arm. Either way, the sound of a Cambodian cocking a gun scares us both very much.

~ J-Dub

The Rural Village Game !

One of the great things about my job is that I get to meet the local people of Cambodia. We are helping some of "worst of the worst" financially (shout out Jo-Tel) and part of my job involves scouting new locations for our water well project. Basically, it consits of meeting with the village chief and offering a clean water source for free. We have yet to meet a chief that says no.

As you can tell from the above photo, the water well is about the only thing the family has beside their homemade house, which by the way, most of which is made from their own land. This is so common in the vast majority of Cambodia, where over 85% of the people live in rural areas.

Well, when I was heading back to town after a bumpy, rocky, and very dusty moto-bike ride on a blazing hot day, my driver stopped suddenly on the side of the clay road. A family was buchering some sort of animal on the side of the road in front of their house. See second photo. My driver got all excited and started shouting some Khmer words to the folks, and they hollered some more Khmer back to him. They got a plastic bag and put some meat in it. He tied up the bag and put it on the handle of the moto and we were off.

Thus the game was born: Name that Animal !

Go ahead: Take a guess....

~ J-Dub