Going to jail in Cambodia (and getting beat with a rubber hose)

According to sources close to the Cali Thais, prisions in Cambodia aren't as terrible as you might think. Bear's brother knows a fellow Khmer kickboxer buddy who is in jail for allegedly kicking the shit out of someone. The guy claims he didn't do it, but since he is known around Siem Reap as being the best kickboxer, accusations were taken as fact and he is locked up indefinitely. Apparently the vicitim had "holes" in three different parts of his head. So B's bro went to visit the guy in jail.

The good- the Cambodian jail system feeds, clothes, and provides shelter for all the inmates. The bad- it administers beating the inmates with a rubber hose every morning. That's right, a rubber hose. Why would they beat inmates? To give them discipline? Keep them in check? Is this a form of Cambodian capital punishment? Is this a cultural ritual, or some archaic common law similar to those in the Southern US states? No.... It's to remind the inmates that jail is worse than normal life. Leave the romanticized vision of the farmer picking rice in the fields for the children and the ignorant; life in rural villages is like permantly camping without an REI to buy high tech tents and wicking socks. Similar to Rousseau's notion of savage man before the passions took root (Hobbes had it all wrong).

But beatings aside, the real kicker is how fucked the justice system is. The alleged offense took place two months ago, and there is a preliminary trial set for six months from now. Despite the date of his trial, he already knows that he will be in jail for 6 years or until someone pays for his release. No, no, not bail. More like pay the fine and you go, no questions asked. The fine is set at $1000. This poor guy (quite literally) can't afford this, he is bound to spend the next six years waking up to the crack of rubber. So much for the Sixth Admendment, and it shows what six years of someone's life is worth in Cambodia.

Just a quick example of how corruption runs rampant, and the difficulty of progress in the country.

- Dubbers

Off to Cambodia

The Cali Thais will be on hiatus from blogging while they travel to Cambodia for a visa run. Fear not as we will be back soon, in about a week or so. Until then, love your neighbor like you love your mom.

Sopranos Update

Episode 24 airs tonight in selected living rooms around the world.

Almost a full day worth of continuous Sopranos satisfaction is under our belt.

So what's good? I recommend the stawberry flavored chicken

With a limited selection of restaurants in our immediate area near our office, Bear and I regularly frequent a place called "Born Street Stakehouse." The name is misleading because it's not a steak house and the name of the steet where it's located is actually 'Bond St.' But that's beside the point-- it has quality Thai food, classy atmosphere, and affordable prices. Not wanting to effort the two blocks to eat there, we decided to order in.

Bear places the should-be simple order of: 2 steamed rice, 1 lemon-grass chicken, 2 masiman curry, and 2 ice-teas with milk.

But the regular guy who speaks better-than-average-broken-english was absent, and in his place, Bear was forced to talk to three different people to get the right order. He suspected that the last person who could finally understand what he wanted was most likely a customer.

After 20 minutes, we get our order: 2 steamed rice, 2 masiman, 1 french fries, and 1 grilled chicken, and 2 ice-teas with no milk. Not bad... In fact, they were pretty damn close. But the most troubling thing was that the grilled chicken tasted like strawberries. How you can make chicken taste like strawberries, I haven't a guess, but it was delicious. Not an overwhelmingly pungent taste, but just a subtle hint.

So here's the lesson: What you expect may differ form what you actually get, but don't get angry because it just might taste remarkably like stawberry. And who doesn't like stawberry?

~ J- Dub

Bird Flu(ke) Comic is Disturbing

From the Saturday edition of The Nation. Can someone explain how this is funny? Can you imagine the uproar this would stir in the States? Wow, only here.

~ J-Dub

Trip to Phuket

After the devestating December Tsumani, the main revenue of tourism in the stunning island of Phuket was hit very hard. There were claims that many Thais were reluctant to visit due to fears of the island being cursed. But with many extraodinary deals from hotels, airlines, and tour operators, the reboud seems imment for the high season starting next month. The reconstuction in the last nine months of many of the resorts was amazing.


Bear, myself, and my college friend Emmeline who is visiting all ventured to Phuket for a three night work/play adventure. We got some great flight deals and fortunate to have wonderful cousins who offered their timeshare so we had accomodation covered. It was great to get out of the office and enjoy the surroundings of a truely amazing island. The beaches are gorgeous with white sand and prestine green and blue water.

We rented boogie boards one day, laughed loads, and drank booze by the beach. Bear however, accomplished a lot for work, inspecting hotels, smoozing, and negotiating hotel contract rates. He was on point. Especially driving our rented car, which is no small feat because in Thailand they drive on the wrong side of the road (i.e. the U.K.) and locals drive like it's their first time in a car.

You should definitely think about visiting.

~J-Dub

J-Dub and Michael Owen

Never in my life have I been mistaken for a celeberty nor do I think I look particularly like any celeberty. But ever since I moved to Thailand I can't shake people coming up and saying that I look like the Newcastle United Striker Michael Owen.

Because I don't follow soccer on any level, I had no idea who this dude was. And to be honest I really didn't care until the seventh Thai mentioned the resemblance. That's when I thought I should do some research to make sure this dude wasn't some notorious sexual pedator that was wanted by the authorities. Well to my surprise, he's an international soccer star.

I really don't know how to feel about this. On the one hand, it's flattering because he's a pretty good looking guy. But on the other hand, he's way better looking. Let the pictures speak for themselves. I could make excuses like the lighting in Owen's photo makes him look better, or having spent all day in the sun, my lobster red face just doesn't compare to Owen's brozen tan. But I won't make excuses and instead capitualate to modesty.

What do you do in situations like this? The next time someone brings it up, should I pretend to be Michael's brother and delve into a witty fictional anecdote about how Michael used to wet his bed when he was young? Say thank you and smile in my best Owen impression?

~ J-Dub