Da Marathon

I finished my first marathon in Thailand, and must say it was pretty awesome. So many damn hours of running in dust and heat of Cambodia finally paid off.

The race was slow, long, and painful at times. It went like this:

I woke up nice and early last Sunday morning at 3:30am to be sure I could eat some food and drink plenty of water. I applied the necessary tape and Vaseline to help prevent chaffing, grabbed a few baht, laced up my shoes and was ready to go. There were some other runners from Malaysia, Singapore, and Germany staying at the same bungalows as me, and when we met in the lobby at 4:30am there was much discussion of racing strategies. Everyone was shocked that I didn’t have a wrist watch and lacked a clear projected time for finishing. I told them that since it was my first marathon, I just wanted to finish the race in one piece. They laughed and before long we piled into a van and drove to the starting line.

When we reached the starting line, I thought we were in the wrong place, because the scene looked more like a discotheque with loud speakers, neon lights, and people everywhere. But sure enough it was the right place. The sky was black, but the vibe was electric. With five minutes until go time, people from over 40 countries were stretching and loosening up.

The first 5K was pretty slow, and I was terrified of not having enough energy later in the race, so I tried to keep a slow and steady pace. Despite running in darkness and with no sun, the humidity was high, and the air was sticky. When the sky lit up about 40 minutes later, there were some dark clouds in the distance that looked menacing. Sure enough, at the 10K marker it started to rain. Then it started to rain really hard. Then the thunder and lightning came. Everything I was wearing instantly became soaked, including my shoes which felt like lead weights.

Fortunately, the clouds meant no blazing sun, and it was a tropical rain storm, which meant a warm rain. After about 25 minutes, the rain stopped, but thanks to the humidity (wink) I was saturated for the remainder of the race. The two pairs of thin socks I wore proved to be a small miracle- no serious blisters during or after the race!

The course started through the city streets with motorbikes, cars, and trucks passing dangerously close, and I tried my best to run along the shoulder with all the other runners. It then made its way into unpopulated undulating hills with jungle all around. Fog from the nearby coast hovered among the rubber trees and rows of pineapple fields. It was gorgeous. The scenery was helping to distract my attention from my legs, which did not like the hills and from my feet which did not like my wet shoes.

Kilometer 12-30 were kind of a blur. I remember running along the ocean at one point thinking how lucky I was to be running in paradise. At another point I remember passing a novice monk following his elder collecting morning alms and watching me at my snail’s pace with a curious smile. As I reached the 30K mark at 3hr, 36min and fatigue was truly setting in. I found I was walking more now before and after the water stations.

It was tough getting to each of the next kilometer markers. There were only a few people around, and more often than not, I found I was by myself. It took a lot of positive self-talk to keep going. At kilometer 34 there was a set of rolling hills that I was totally unprepared for. This really took it out of me…. The course just kept going and going and going.

I reached Kilometer 38 and was greeted by some familiar faces cheering me on – The Jaw, Bear, A, C, & C.

‘Run, John, Run,’ little C said.

I stopped for a minute for some hugs, and then kept running with The Jaw and Bear by my side. My cousins were great motivators telling me that I couldn’t do what I wanted to do most: walk. As the last of the race was approaching, more and more people appeared cheering me on. So I kept running, albeit very slowly.

I reached the finish line (42Km) with A and kids there again cheering me on. I couldn’t help but smile and crossed the finish line at 5hr. 29min. It was a magical moment. I felt tired and weak, but elated at the same time. Months of training in Cambodia alone had been for this moment. It was surreal. I had visualized it many times in training, and it was finally here. I made it!

~ J-Dub

Note on Self-Reliance

I live at a place where I don't have to do my own laundry, cook for myself, or clean my room. I can't help but wonder whether having cooks, cleaners, wait staff, and all the others weakens the spirit of self reliance. Does the effort and time saved by these assistants surpass the countless headaches caused by them?

~ J-Dub

So What is it Like to Live in Thailand?

Crazy things have happened to J-Dub and Bear while in Thailand that probably shouldn't be written on this blog. So rather than write about them, we'd like to share with you the dudes who own The Big Mango, a bar in a red-light district of Bangkok. While the Cali Thais' actions do not necessarily resemble anything they talk about, it gives another side of BKK that plays a small part of what it is like to live in Thailand. We give you:

The Big Mango Blog

From Weird to Normal

After living in a foreign country for a couple years, the things that were surprising, weird, odd, and funny at first tend to become more and more normal. I really should do a 'you know you've been in Asia too long when...' but a post like that must be really funny and I can never remember all the good ones when I sit down to write. Damn.

Nonetheless, I do have one story about getting a massage in the bathroom of a Cambodian Club while trying to take a piss. Now a whole post could also be written about the club scene in Cambodia. It tends only to be fun if it's your first experience or if you're too drunk to notice the ear-bleeding volume levels, the epilepsy-inducing neon lights, the pre-teen looking crowd, and the stank of cheap cigarettes.

Last night was neither my first time nor was I really drunk, but I managed to have a lot of fun. When I had to go to the bathroom I was reminded of the first time I went to the bathroom in a Cambodian club. I asked my cuz where the bathroom was and he told me.

Then he said, "Oh yeah, don't be surprised if someone massages you while you're in there."

J-Dub, "What?!?"

Cuz smiles.

Before I finish the story of getting my first massage while taking a piss, I have to re-tell a joke a Cambodian named Sela just told me. It goes like this:

A rich man is at a beer garden. The waiter gives him the menu and very politely tells him what he recommends to eat. The rich becomes angry because the waiter is so polite and yells at him. He tells the waiter to bend over and then slaps the man across the face.

The waiter leaves, and comes back a few minutes later. Knowing that the rich man will get angry if he talks politely, he asks the man what he wants to eat in a very impolite way. The rich man becomes angry again because the waiter talks to him impolitely. He tells the waiter to bend over and slaps him again due to his attitude.

The waiter leaves and is now very mad. He decides to pee into the man's beer so he fills up the bottle with his urine. Then he goes back to the table and serves the rich man his beer. Before the man drinks it, he asks the waiter which year he was born. The waiter tells the man. They are the same age, so the rich man hits his hand on the table, and tells the waiter they are now friends. So he tells the waiter to drink with him. The waiter joins the man at the table. They raise their glasses to drink, and only the waiter drinks his own urine as the rich man asks him where he was born. After drinking half the glass, the waiter tells him. They are from the same town. So the rich man hits his hand on the table again, and says they must drink again. When they go to drink, the waiter drinks all his urine, but the rich man doesn't drink anything....

End of joke.

Back to the massage thing. So as I head to the bathroom, everything appears normal and innocuous. So I head to the troff and relieve myself. Before I get things started, a Cambodian comes up right behind me in some ninja type stealth. As every man knows having some dude standing right behind you while you're trying to get things started is terribly distracting. And it wasn't like he was waiting for an empty urinal, because I was the only horse at the troff.

So I continue my business trying to think of baseball, and not the dude giving me a massage. Having recently arrived from SF, I was a bit apprehensive about it. But I manage to finish, and when I was zipped up, the dude grabs my chin and top of head. He yanks it at a diagonal direction wrenching at least three vertebrae in my neck. Then in the opposite direction. It was amazing how dangerous it was, yet how great it was. Then I was led to the sink where a hot towel was waiting. All this service was well worth the suggested gratuity of fifty cents.

Fortunately, I had some forewarning about having a dude approaching so I didn't hit him when he started to massage my shoulders. Now I have to say, it was very weird at first. While the Khmers must be some of the least homophobic people, I didn't know that at the time. I just thought it was super gay. But after seeing hella dudes getting massages while taking a piss, it's now just kinda normal. Funny to think that this happened two years ago, and what's more weird isn't the massage itself, but how normal it is now.

~ J-Dub

J-Dub Stays in Asia

J-Dub loves Asia and is staying longer. He is now living full-time in Cambodia.

He is going to miss Bear Bear, who is going back to live in US and will probably make three times the bones he makes right now. Like PETE in a Jo-Tel-all-over-the-map kind of way, we all hope he will continue to post on the Cali Thais blog even though he won't be in Asia, since only his posts get comments.